Midnight Bridges
by WizardsGirl
Summary: In another world, Izuku heads straight home, and All Might tells him "You CAN be a Hero!" In another world, he is given Hope from his Hero, and, in turn, gives his Hero Hope. This is not that world. In this world, he finds his Hope on the ledge of a bridge, in a scarred hand and wry smile in the middle of the night.


**A/N:** Just got through a rather long depressive episode, decided to do a one-shot for it.

Because there are a lot of AU's where Aizawa (especially) or All For One or even Overhaul stop Izuku from committing suicide, but I wanted someone else to shine, so enjoy my Headcanon and take care of yourselves.

I am doing much better, no worries! Tiktok has been helping me out there, feel free to come see my videos (mostly of my dog and cat being dumbasses lolz)! My name there is **Tangent Spinner**! ^-^ I do duets and random shit so hopefully see you there!

(Also, its connected to my YouTube which I do Let's Reads on and as soon as I find where I put the damn book, I was reading I will post more videos for it)

Take care!

**[EDIT: 10/23/20:** It was pointed out that I have Midoriya Hisashi alive here when in the Sequel I (Spoiler) have him dead already so! Fixed it!**]**

**Midnight Bridges**

Izuku knew that he should be heading home. That his Kaachan had no-doubt seen the Slime Villain attack (part two) on TV. That, if his phone wasn't currently broken in the bottom of his bag, she would be blowing it up with calls and texts of increasing anxiety. He knew this, knew he should have headed straight towards home and not in the opposite direction, but…

"_Take a swan dive off the roof!"_

"_Someone who is Quirkless __**cannot**__ be a Hero…"_

"_And pray for a Quirk in the next life!"_

"_Be realistic."_

His chest hurt…

(In another life, Izuku was tired and disheartened but decided to head straight home. On the way there, All Might appeared and gave him Hope and the promise of a Quirk. This isn't that life)

His heart hurt, his throat hurt from his near-suffocation, his burned shoulder hurt, and his thoughts were dark and quiet. For once, his eyes, usually so quick to tear up, were dry and dull, aimed at his feet. His favorite red shoes were stained with ashes and sludge, and he absently noted that his clothes would have to be thrown away. Just another ruined uniform for his Kaachan to replace. One more expense charged for being Quirkless.

"_Be Realistic"_

"_Stupid Deku!"_

"_Worthless"_

"_Quirkless"_

"_Weak"_

"_Take a swan dive off the roof!"_

"_**Cannot** be a Hero…"_

Izuku slowed to a stop, teeth gritted, dry eyes burning, hands clenched into fists so tight his knuckles ached. Despair rose like bile in the back of his throat, choking him on the aftertaste, as if the rancid taste of the Slime Villain and the familiar sickly-sweet scent of Kacchan's explosions hadn't already been suffocating him with every breath. Copper and bile lingered there, burning, and Izuku found his clenched fists rising to fist his shirt over his heart, body hunching over in pain as he gagged, eyes squeezing shut.

_His._

_Heart._

_**Hurt**_.

Izuku… Disassociated, for a little while, after that. Blanked out, dazed and hurt and gasping for every breath. It, it wasn't something that happened often, wasn't something he was comfortable explaining or accepting about himself, outside of the analytical aspects of it. He could count on one hand the number of times it had happened, and still have fingers left over, but each time it happened, it was preceded with an overwhelming amount of negative emotions. Logically, he knew it was because of his depression and anxiety reaching an all-time high. Now, however, after coming too curled in a ball on the ground in a filthy alley, an unknown amount of time later, Izuku couldn't find the energy to _care_.

He was just _so tired_. He was _tired_ and _hurt_ and he just wanted it all to _stop_. Even for just a minute, for just _one, entire minute_ of peace, of _not hurting_… He would give up on _everything_, on every dream and plan, for just _one. Minute_.

He just…

His heart hurts…

Vaguely, he recognizes where he's at, recognizes the graffitied poles and walls of the bridge. And, in a daze, he finds himself staggering to his feet and over to the closest stone pylon. He leaned against the stone, staring over the edge blankly. It was late enough that the yawning space beneath the bridge looked almost like an abyss, the distant train tracks only a slightly darker shadow against it. It… It was far enough away that, that if he l-landed headfirst…

Izuku…

Izuku had never actually _thought_ about it before, about killing himself. He'd gotten 'helpful suggestions' from classmates, of course, everything from hanging to slitting his wrists, but both of those involved hurting himself and, and Izuku didn't want to hurt _at all_. But this… If he landed right, calculated the angle and force right…

Izuku didn't remember moving, but, suddenly, he was over the wall, was standing on the small ledge on the outer side, the only thing keeping him from falling his tight hold on the wall behind him. Izuku leaned against the wall, staring down into the darkness, and gasped for air, eyes wide and _why couldn't he cry?_ Any other time, any other place, and he struggled to _stop crying_ but here and now, when he wanted to, when he _needed to_, the tears _wouldn't come._

He just…

_His Heart __**H U R T**_.

Chest aching with every gasped breath, eyes wide and fingers so tight they _burned_, Izuku stared down into the darkness, and just had to decide.

His fingers could let go.

He could end _everything_. Stop every cruel word and every hurt.

Protect himself from everything in a way he'd never gotten to before.

…His Kaachan would have to bury him. The Heroes Relief Fund would stop sending her the money they'd been paying from overseas since Tousan died. She would have one less mouth to feed, but no one to talk to over dinner about her awful boss or about mean old Tachibana-San from three apartments down and her _horrible_ bird that liked to screech curse words at people.

She wouldn't have to deal with having a Worthless Quirkless disappointment of a son anymore…

Izuku's breath stuttered in his chest, and he forced himself to swallow down the taste of bile, fingers rhythmically tightening and loosening against the rough stone behind him in indecision.

"HEY! HEY KID!" A voice shouted, making him flinch, and Izuku jerked his head around briefly to stare in the direction it had come from in surprise at how _loud_ it was. All the way from the other side of the bridge, Izuku was surprised to see the Pro-Hero Present Mic running towards him. Instinctively, his fingers tightened against the wall and his shoulders hunched defensively, body curling in on himself as he flinched away from the approaching Hero. "Whoa, whoa, okay!" the Voice Hero yelped, skidding to a stop a good six feet from Izuku's perch. He held his hands up, palms out, and offered a nervous smile. "Easy, kiddo, I won't come closer, okay? Don't, don't make any hasty decisions, okay? Talk to me, okay, talk to me, kiddo…"

"Talking doesn't help," Izuku gasped out; Present Mic shifted so that he was against the wall, keeping his hands where Izuku could see them.

"It does when you've got good listeners, kid, I promise that," the Hero urged gently. "I should know! Despite my Quirk, I like to listen to others. Just talk to me, kiddo," he urged; Izuku took a shuddering breath.

"I just… I just wanted to be a Hero," he managed to choke out. "D-despite being _Quirkless_, but, but _no one_ believes in me," he managed to gasp, throat tight and _eyes still dry_. A harsh laugh tore from his throat, a mutated sob that was far from funny. "Even, even _All Might_ told me to give up," he spat, despair rising through him. _His heart __**H U R T**__ and he still couldn't__** C R Y**_… "I just… I just _wanted to be a Hero,"_ he whispered, achingly quiet and hurt, staring down at the drop.

"Hey, hey," Present Mic said, leaning forward slightly, eyes wide behind his glasses and expression taught with worry. "Listen to me, okay kiddo? _Listen_," he stated firmly; Izuku flinched slightly and looked over at the Hero hesitantly from the corner of his eye. "_Fuck_ those guys." Izuku sputtered, head jerking around to gape at the Hero, who nodded sharply. "That's right, you heard me! _Fuck. Those. Guys._ Fuck anyone who ever told you that you're worthless without a Quirk. Fuck anyone who ever told you that you couldn't be a Hero _just because_ of your circumstances. _Fuck 'em_. Even All Might."

"B-but," Izuku stuttered; Present Mic shook his head sharply.

"No, kiddo. No but's, no maybe's, no what about this or that. Fuck 'em. You wanna be a Hero? You _be_ a Hero, then. You work your ass off, you tell the doubters to fuck off, and you stand tall and you _spit in fates eye_." With a sharp nod, the Hero hopped up so that he was sitting on the stone wall, straddling it, but staying well away from Izuku, who tensed at the sudden movement. "Listen, kiddo, because I'm going to tell you something serious, okay?" Uncertainly, Izuku nodded. "I was born with my Quirk. You know the first thing that happened?"

"W-what?" Izuku whispered.

"I made my parents and older sister deaf before I hit four, and myself deaf before I hit eight." The usually smiling Hero's face was grim and serious as he straddled the wall. "My dad? His Quirk let him hear electronics, let him listen to wiring to see where a patch or work was needed. I single-handedly ruined a career that kept a roof over our heads, in less than a year. My mom? She's Quirkless, so believe me when I say I know _exactly_ the kind of _bullshit_ you've had to be going through, especially in these times when being Quirkless is seen as a _disease_, as a _disability_. My big sister, her Quirk lets her sing people to sleep, but thanks to me, she was deaf before she turned ten. Believe me, kiddo, _believe me_, when I say that I know what you're feeling right now. _I've been where you are_, I've stood on a rooftop, on a cliff edge, on the side of a bridge, I've _been there_." Expression intense, the Pro-Hero pulled up his sleeves and held his arms out to Izuku, leaning closer across the stone, and Izuku's breath caught in his chest.

Stretched across both Hero's wrists were scars. Thin ones and thick ones, pale ones and darker ones, dozens of them stretched across his wrists. And, down the centers of both forearms, leading from almost his inner-elbows down to his wrists, were the thickest, and obviously deepest, scars.

"When I was fifteen, my older sister told me she wished I had never been born," Present Mic informed Izuku seriously. "She told me if I had never been born, that everything would be fine, that all I was good for was hurting my family and that I should just die. I was already in a dark place at the time, I'd failed my provisional license exam, the only one in my class to do so, and the girl I had a crush on had told me I was annoying and ugly and that I should just fuck off and leave her alone. Then, after all that, to hear my sister, my own _sister_, tell me this? …If it wasn't for my best friend coming to check on me, I would be dead right now."

"B-but, but you're a H-Hero…" Izuku breathed, staring at the scars bared to him, and Present Mic offered him a thin smile.

"No one is perfect, kiddo," he stated firmly. "I've been dealing with depression and self-esteem issues my entire life. Endeavor has a chip on his shoulder the size of Tokyo and the personality of a dumpster fire. All Might has forced himself into isolation because of the amount of pressure the world has shoved onto his shoulders. Gang Orca has PTSD thanks to hate crimes taken against him as a child. _Every_ Hero is a human being, with human issues and emotions and _that's okay_. It gives us a unique ability to empathize with others. That's an important part of being a Hero, being a _real_ Hero," he stated quietly, gently.

"A, a _real_ Hero," Izuku whispered, looking away into the dark below.

"What's your name, kiddo?" Present Mic asked; Izuku flinched, looking over at him again as the Hero sat up, scarred forearms still bared.

"M-Midoriya Izuku," he managed; Present Mic offered him a small smile.

"Well, Midoriya-kun, my name is Yamada Hizashi, otherwise known as Present Mic, and I think that, if you want to be a Hero, you _can be_." Izuku's breath stuttered, his eyes wide as he stared up at the Hero. "I wont lie. It's going to be harder for you than most. People are going to doubt your every success, claim your every win was a result of your opponent being handicapped, and you'll _never_ be able to stand in the spotlight like All Might and Endeavor or the others. But, if you're willing to sweat and bleed and cry for it, willing to work so hard your _bones_ ache, I think you could be one _hell_ of an Underground Hero."

The tears that had been so hard to find made an almost violent reappearance, flooding his dry, burning eyes as his breath hitched and choked in his chest. One of his hands let go of the wall to clutch at the cloth over his heart, sobs shaking his shoulders as Izuku stared at the Pro-Hero.

"And, if you're willing, if you're okay with being helped by an annoying asshole like me?" Present Mic offered, holding out one of those scarred, calloused hands with a gentle smile. "I am _more_ than willing to help you get there, kiddo. And I know a few people who will help as well, if you think you can handle it, of course," he added, smile turning wry. "What do you say, kiddo?" He asked, wiggling his extended fingers a little. "Come over to the light side! We've got free counseling and training regimens that'll make you punch like a _horse_!" Izuku choked on something that could have been a laugh, but was mostly a sob, and turned his body towards the Hero. Trembling from head to toe, he reached out, and took the offered hand.

"Let's get you home, kiddo."

"H-Hai…"

_(One day, years from now, on this same bridge, the Quirkless Hero: Deku, will find a young girl with a "Villainous" Quirk, and will nostalgically find himself offering the exact same hope to her, and smiling through his tears as she, too, puts her hand and fragile trust in his hold with wide, tearful eyes… But that's not for many years. Still, it is a reminder. A reminder that a single, kind and genuine word, can be the brightest guiding light in the darkness of despair. There is always hope. You just have to take the offered hand.)_

**A/N:** So… Would you guys be interested in seeing a chaptered sequel to this? I'm gonna leave this one as a One-Shot Stand-Alone, but I was thinking of doing a fic around what happens after this.

Thoughts?


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